(Interview: Dr Georgiana Mendell) Botanical Manicures Anyone?

FASHIONEATSA: I'm so pleased to say that I'm having tea today with Dr. Georgiana Mendell, who is... uh... someone high up in uh...



Dr. Georgiana Mendell

DR. MENDELL: Eh-em. Vice President of Research of the Biomanux Corporation.

FE: Ah, yes darling. But what is really important is that she is a world renowned expert on the "hand-plant," which I've just been so curious about ever since I saw that fascinating natural history exhibit!




Vernomanus aquatica (attributed to an unknown researcher)

DM: Its proper name is "Vernomanus." Latin, like all proper names of living organisms, and that is the genus name, so there are numerous identified species. Yes, we did have that nice exhibit of fossils, historical images, and modern images in 2003, sponsored by our company and curated by Ms. Christine Chin of Purdue University.




Vernomanus deceptriformis Crawfordsville, Indiana ca. 250 mya #1522

FE: You know, I had no idea that a species like that existed. I can't ever recall seeing a picture of a plant that looked quite so much like a hand before seeing your exhibit on... uh... verno-man...

DM: Vernomanus. Well, where have you looked? It's not like they list every species in high school biology text books, and if you're not a colorful flower you aren't going to make it onto any calendars or postcards. Admittedly, Vernomanus species have been in decline since the 1800s, but there are a few noted sightings rather close to here, in upstate New York. You might have to get a little bit off the beaten path, and maybe push aside some groundcover...

FE: Darling, I can't remember the last time I went off wandering in the woods. Certainly not in these shoes! By the way, what brings you to our little island of concrete and skyscrapers?

DM: I'm meeting with some investors here in the city, and then I'm visiting some researchers upstate who might have found some Vernomanus specimens that our company might be interested in.



Vernomanus digitalus in Biomanux Co. greenhouses (2003)

FE: So, I saw those pictures of your greenhouses with what looks like HUNDREDS of little verno-whatevers growing... what exactly are you planning to do with all of those?

DM: I am afraid I am not at liberty to discuss our company's plans... competition is intense in the biotech world. You understand of course.

FE: Well, then, perhaps you could answer a question of another sort... do your hand-plants have fingernails?

DM: Uh... some of them do have some calcified protective surfaces, yes.

FE: Then, darling, the question is, what are your plans for manicuring them? It would be unseemly to have them going about with cracked and dirty nails... and I'm sure being so close to the ground and all that they would be rather desparate for some professional attention.

DM: I have to admit that manicuring the protective surfaces was not our chief concern. I suppose if it really became a problem we could get a few manicurists on staff.

FE: Why of course. I'm so glad I mentioned it. And, the next question is, of course-- are they edible? Because, properly manicured, they would be the PERFECT addition to a Fashioneatsa's diet!

DM: Um... I'm not sure exactly what you mean.... What is this we are eating, by the way...?

FE: Oh, just a little snack I cooked up. Powdered Petite Fours. Aren't the colors just lovely... I used Shimmer Shadow in opal, velvet plum, tulip pink, and bakini bare.

DM: I'm sorry, I just remembered that I had a few errands to run before my afternoon meetings. I'll just be going now, so nice meeting you...

FE: Darling, no need to rush... it isn't like a little fashion is going to hurt you...!

Some people. And I could have recommended an excellent hair and nail salon. At least she had a healthy portion of Powder Petit Fours before she left, she certainly needed them.